updated 03/05/2008 AT 12:30 PM ET
•originally published 03/05/2008 AT 1:00 PM ET
Demi Moore’s looks may be the source of constant comment, but in her own mind, they’re sometimes a source of anxiety.
“Look, I would be lying if I said I don’t have moments of panic when I look in the mirror and see things creeping in that weren’t there before,” Moore, 45, tells Harper’s Bazaar for its April issue, about getting older. “But now I stop, and instead of focusing on my flaws, I think about all that I have in my life.”
Those rewards are not only tangible, she says, but human: “I have a wonderful marriage, I have three wonderful daughters, I have an incredible extended family, and I have loving, wonderful friends.”
As a result, she says, “when I look back in the mirror, the reflection I see isn’t so bad, because I’m seeing the beauty of my whole being and my whole life.”
In their first family portrait for a magazine, Moore’s daughters by former husband Bruce Willis – Rumer, 19, Scout 16, and Tallulah, 14 – also ring in with their observations on mom and her life with stepdad Ashton Kutcher, 30, who has been with Moore for the past five years.
In terms of initially bringing Kutcher home (in addition to her girls, Moore’s house in Los Angeles includes three Chihuahuas and an elderly mutt named Wonka), Moore admits, “I didn’t bring somebody into their lives lightly. Being with me isn’t about just being in a relationship with me; it’s about someone stepping into a situation where there is already a huge level of responsibility.”
And the age difference between them? “People made such a fuss about it, you would have thought the world had never seen it before,” says Moore. “Age wasn’t what I was thinking about, but to the rest of the world it was a very big deal.”
The Girls’ Reactions
Scout also notices another change that overtook her mother – ever since Moore took up studying Kabbalah. “She has always moved from religion to religion according to the stages in her life,” says the teen. “Kabbalah is the one she has stuck with the most. I respect that she and Ashton are doing it.”
Another Kabbalah proponent, Madonna, is cited by Moore as one of her personal role models, as is Maya Angelou, Katharine Hepburn, Susan Sarandon, Coco Chanel, Oprah Winfrey, Mother Teresa – and her own grandmother.
Ashton Speaks Up
Kutcher is heard from, too. “At first, I didn’t know how it was all going to play out, but everything fell into place,” he says of having an instant family. “We all support each other. I’m occasionally overwhelmed by everyone s generosity.”
Overwhelmed, indeed, seems the operative word. Adds Ashton: “I am eternally grateful for having them in my life. That makes me want to cry and hug them and cry a little bit more.”