updated 04/23/2013 AT 6:55 PM ET
•originally published 04/23/2013 AT 7:30 PM ET
You can watch all the dating shows you want. But once you’re a contestant, suddenly it’s real – sometimes painfully so.
“It is more stressful going to that garden than anything else,” Arguello, 34, tells PEOPLE.
“The garden is unreal,” adds Patton. “You’re essentially breaking up with someone. You’re not just saying, ‘Hey, here’s a rose for you. And you guys didn’t get a rose,’ and walk off.”
Another challenging aspect of the show? Watching yourself on TV – particularly the kissing scenes!
“It’s like hearing your own voice on voicemail,” says Patton. “And it’s even more uncomfortable when you see yourself and a girl, and you’re thinking, ‘Everyone’s watching this at home!’”