Bethenny Frankel Surprised Divorce Is Not Amicable

updated 05/01/2013 AT 8:00 AM ET

originally published 04/30/2013 AT 7:15 PM ET

While Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy aren’t scheduled to return to divorce court for a few more weeks, the reality-star-turned-talk-show-host has been giving a lot of thought to how far apart she and her ex have drifted.

At the time of the split, Frankel released a statement in which she said that she and Hoppy hoped to “amicably co-parent” their daughter Bryn, who turns 3 next month.

Now, in an exclusive interview with PEOPLE, Frankel says she can see that’s going to be a challenge.

“I really did think it would be amicable. I absolutely did,” she says. “I wrote that entire statement myself. And every single word, I believed to be true.”

Now, faced with divorce negotiations that continue to drag on – while Hoppy continues to wear his wedding ring – Frankel is left to wonder how she could have been so off the mark.

“Someone said to me recently, ‘We see what we want to see.’ And I guess, at the time, that’s what I did,” she says.

Still, the Skinnygirl guru hasn’t stopped looking for the positive.

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