updated 06/25/2013 AT 8:00 AM ET
•originally published 06/25/2013 AT 9:20 AM ET
Former Bachelor contestant Desiree Hartsock is calling the shots and handing out the roses as the current star of The Bachelorette. The bridal stylist will blog all season long on PEOPLE.com about her dates, the guys and the difficult decisions she must make. You can also follow Desiree on Twitter.
I always dreamed of traveling the world – and I never thought being on The Bachelorette would be my chance. Boarding the plane to Germany, I had butterflies because I had never been to Europe. On the flight I daydreamed of romantic dates, castles and finding my Prince Charming.
I felt better than ever and truly thought nothing could change my mood for the week. Little did I know, drama was brewing…
I couldn’t wait to spend a full day with Chris. It was important for me to see if we could have fun being tourists and just be spontaneous. I also wanted to see how he looked in a pair of lederhosen! Chris was so playful that I knew we could have fun together on a daily basis. And he was the perfect man to be there after my surprise visitor.
Even though I know I’m dating multiple guys, it was awkward to be in the middle of a fun and random moment with Chris and have Bryden show up. My worlds were colliding.
Bryden was not one to open up easily, but I was shocked he wanted to leave. He seemed so reassured in Atlantic City. Bryden should have told me how he was feeling back in the States, before coming all the way to Germany and interrupting my date with Chris. I didn’t know if I should be angry, sad, worried, or what … but it definitely raised questions about the remaining men. Are they committed to see if this could work or will they also leave unexpectedly?
I was caught off-guard and I’m not sure I said everything I had to say to Bryden. I’m definitely anxious to see him at the Men Tell All taping.