updated 04/06/2014 AT 6:55 AM ET
•originally published 04/04/2014 AT 6:30 PM ET
When Game of Thrones returns for its fourth season Sunday night, fans will get to enjoy the latest adventures in the reign of King Joffrey Baratheon, a blond tyrant who rules Westeros with an ironfisted combination of petulance and sadism. To celebrate Joffrey’s impending nuptials, we’ve given him a wedding gift: a list of the horrible TV children just as bad as himself. Maybe they can have a playdate – just leave the crossbows at home.
Joffrey Baratheon, Game of Thrones
Was it the incest or the upbringing, or was he just born wrong? Fans of the Song of Ice and Fire books have debated this point since the ’90s, but no matter the argument, there’s one point they can all agree on: In the War of the Five Kings, he’s the one you’d least want sitting on the Iron Throne.
Stewie Griffin, Family Guy
Animation lets you get away with a lot. A child who was obsessed with killing his mother and various other criminal schemes would be totally unsettling in real life, but as voiced by Seth MacFarlane, Stewie became Family Guy’s most (only?) charming character. Just like with Hannibal Lecter, the British accent helps.
Jason McCann, CSI
Played by a young Canadian actor with little TV experience, McCann was a devil in disguise, nursing a violent grudge against cops underneath a beautiful haircut. His mad bombing spree terrorized the entire Las Vegas Police Department until, in one of YouTube’s most popular clips, he was gunned down by police off the side of a highway.
Anthony Fremont, The Twilight Zone
As the Twilight Zone episode “It’s a Good Life” repeatedly emphasizes, everybody in the small town of Peakesville is awfully fond of freckle-faced Anthony. Of course, that’s because Anthony can read their minds, and if they think anything he doesn’t like, he’ll send them straight to “the cornfield” – and no one ever comes back. Unusual for The Twilight Zone, there’s no twist ending here: The townsfolk are going to be stuck living with Anthony until he grows up. But with his godlike powers, will he ever?