Birds That Fill Me with a Vague but Persistent Dread: The Seagull

Friends, I’d like to be honest with you.

The strain of gazing deep into the bird-byss, the bird-void, the deep uncaring nothingness that is bird-kind, week after week here at Birds That Fill Me with a Vague but Persistent Dread is real. And it’s beginning to take a toll on me.

First Wolf Pack in Nearly 100 Years Discovered in CA

Brothers and sisters in the wolf pack of life, rejoice. Wildlife officials in California confirmed the first wolf pack in nearly 100 years has been discovered in remote Siskyou County. The pack, two adults and five pups, has been named the Shasta Pack.

Last year, wildlife officials added gray wolves to the state’s endangered species list. They were operating under the assumptions that Oregon’s wolf population would eventually migrate to California – at the time, no wolves were even known to exist in the state.

Thieves Steal a Baker's Dozen of Gators from Arkansas Zoo

Self-Proclaimed Wizard Banned from Australian Zoo for Antagonizing Gorillas

Continuing last week’s trend of “Foolish People Irritating Large Animals,” a self-proclaimed wizard from Christchurch, New Zealand, has been banned from Orana Wildlife park for enraging one of its gorillas.

Birds That Fill Me with a Vague but Persistent Dread: The Pelican

This is the third installment of Birds That Fill Me with a Vague but Persistent Dread, and so I’d like to think we’ve reached a casual, sort of easygoing relationship.

In that spirit, can I be real with you for a moment?

[Pulls up chair, spins chair around, sits in chair in the manner of a cool high-school teacher]

Nothing about this bird is okay. I’ve long suspected the pelican of being little more than ruthless avarice and greed personified in bird form, but I recently saw something that shook me to my very core, and I need to speak on it.

We Could Watch this Bear Blunder Around for Salmon Forever (VIDEO)

Watch This Baby Cheetah Get Acquainted with Its Companion Puppy (VIDEO)

Cecil the Lion's Killing Prompts Actor Kirk Douglas to Recall 'Uncomfortable Memory' of Hunting in Kenya

Cecil the lion’s death has sparked worldwide outrage, but for Hollywood legend Kirk Douglas, it’s prompted him to recall memories of what he calls “the most stupid thing I’ve ever done.”

Birds That Fill Me with a Vague but Persistent Dread: The Acorn Woodpecker

Welcome to Birds That Fill Me with a Vague but Persistent Dread, a new daily column here at PEOPLE Pets.

Today’s Bird That Fills Me with a Vague but Persistent Dread is the Acorn Woodpecker (Melanerpes formicivorus), pictured above in Costa Rica.

Why the expression of hysterical, on-edge, hand-in-the-cookie jar guilt, Melanerpes formicivorus? What have you done?

Watch This Hummingbird Change Colors Every Second (VIDEO)

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